Yesterday I was watching Stand By Me, one of the best youth movies from the 80s, for about the nth time and I remembered how kind of brilliant (if immature- the film does centre around a bunch of twelve year olds after all) the cusses and retorts in this movie were.
"Suck my fat one, you cheap dime store hood."
"Piss up a rope!"
"Did your mother ever have any kids that lived?"
Teddy: You morphadite!
Gordy: Don't call me any of your mother's pet names.
Gordy: Shut up.
ALL: I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you I throw up!
Gordy: And then your mother comes around and she licks it up.
"I'm gonna rip your head off and shit down your neck."
"Let him do his own fighting!"
"Sure, you only outweigh him by five hundred pounds, fat ass!"
Vince: I bet you $1000 they find him before that.
Other Guy: I bet you $2000 they don't!
Ace: Would you two just shut the fuck up? If either of you assholes had $2000, I'd kill you both.
"I'll only be young once."
"Yeah, but you'll be stupid for the rest of your life."
Then of course there are the poignant lines, "I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?".
And River Phoenix, in general.
I love River Phoenix's character in this movie (Chris Chambers), for saying things like, "It's like God gave you somethings man, all those stories that you can make up...And He said, "This is what we got for you kid, try not to lose it." Kids lose everything unless there's someone there to look out for them. And if your parents are too fucked up to do it then maybe I should."
And that beautiful song by Ben E. King, in the video of which, River Phoenix and Wil Wheaton are so cute:
In short. Watch this movie, okay. Just go and watch it, even if you've watched it some time before.
“We're not riding off of other people's fans and popularity by doing reposts, we're pushing out original content and asking our viewers to care about what we have to say or what we think is funny.”
“I want young girls to redefine what it means to be "WILD" and for them to feel like it's cool to truly be yourself”
“Two infinity and beyond!”
Shandrea Lewdram is made up of the sharp Toronto girls, performer Andrea Lewis and writer Shannon Boodram. Those girls are on it. They are deeply amusing, inspirational, WILD. Hence the name of their fabulous blog Those Girls Are Wild (“No, it’s not a porn site I swear”- something I say on a regular basis as I am always recommending their blog to people).
They are a pair of genuine best friends, “we started out in a crew of 40+ girls in grade 9 (called the bad gyals) then we downsized to 5 girls in grade 11 (called Legalidies), then after high school it became just me and Andrea (Those Wild gyals!)”, they put fantastically funny skits on youtube and they discuss everything from fake accents and whether or not kids should be sentenced as adults, to relationship advice and more in their "Topic of the Week" segment.
Since she was scouted in a mall at a young age, this truly talented performer has starred in a whole host of films and television shows from Down in the Delta, directed by Maya Angelou, to Nickelodeon's first musical, Spectacular (and you can now catch her show, Degrassi: The Next Generation at 12:30 on Saturdays, BBC2.) She participates in all manner of charity events, such as World AIDS Day, YWCA and UNICEF campaigns and now she is coming out with an album, press play below to fall in love with her wonderful voice:
Send in a letter about something you want to get off your chest.
Dear The People Remaking Shit That Should Have Been Left Well Alone,
"Hey did you hear they’re remaking... [Insert the name of every half decent film ever made here, please.]"
O film industry, what the fuck happened? When did your originality decide to piss off, reducing you to not only desperately scrambling for some book to make a half-assed adaptation of but also remaking any film that was ever even sort of maybe slightly kinda liked. And not just the ones that were made 50 years ago, no. I’m talking about the ones that were only made in the 80s and 90s!
Who told you the Karate Kid needed to be redone? And what, no seriously what in the hell possessed you redo it with Jackie Chan and Jaden Smith?
...Was this an inside joke...?
And to whoever is personally responsible for crapping up good memories of Ten Things I Hate About You by presenting that*- um, what the hell man? What was that?
I genuinely could go on for pages, but I think you get it.
Hear this, original screenplays are not illegal you know. So stop attempting to scrape whatever money you can from ripping off something good. It’s kind of pathetic. I’m feeling embarrassed for you.
One last note, if you allow Zac Efron to carry out his wishes of remaking Back to the Future, I will stop sharing your unbearable shame and just come over there and bitch-slap you.
Watch it.
*It was remade into a TV series not another film. But the show was deeply crap. So it definitely deserves to be in here.
HAIR at The Gielgud Theatre, Shaftesbury Avenue, London
Box Office: call 0844 482 5130 or visit www.hairthemusical.co.uk
Tickets: £16.50 - £65.00
Performances: Mon-Sat 7:30pm, Thurs & Sat 2:30pm
BY: HANNAH MARSHALL
So I have pretty much been ridiculously excited about seeing Hair since my tickets arrived two months ago. The Tony Award winning revival of the smash hit rock musical opened here in the UK on April 1st and the original Broadway cast is currently spreading the love at the Gielgud theatre.
Following the story of Claude, who is part of a group of hippies living in a USA torn apart by the highly controversial Vietnam War, and facing the prospect of being conscripted themselves, Hair has been described by the Daily Telegraph as ‘a beacon of hope in a fallen world.’ The show is certainly bursting with energy and has some truly beautiful, funny and touching moments. In comparison with other shows on the West End right now, it offers a truly unremitting affirmation of the power of belief in love, life, equality and freedom. The cast’s commitment towards the message of the show, (the lead Gavin Creel is a co-founder of the equality charity BroadwayImpact and the cast has also taken part in protests for gay marriage across the USA) is infectious and you’ll find yourself wanting to jump out of your seat and join in, something which is very much encouraged, or going home to paint a giant hippie mural for your bedroom (something which I definitely didn’t just spend the last day and a half doing).
Books: Suite Scarlett by Maureen Johnson, I Am Not Myself These Days by Josh Kilmer-Purcell, Candy Everybody Wants by Josh Kilmer-Purcell, The Earth, My Butt and Other Big, Round Things by Carolyn Mackler, Love and Other Four Letter Words by Carolyn Mackler, Welcome to the World, Baby Girl! by Fannie Flagg, Fly on the Wall by E. Lockhart. TV: How To Make It In America. Film: Manhattan Murder Mystery, August Rush, Uptown Girls, Home Alone 2: Lost In New York, A Guide to Recognising Your Saints, Kids, Little Manhattan, Raising Helen, Nick + Norah's Infinite Playlist (this is also a book!), The Perfect Man (despite the fact that this stars Hilary Duff, it is nothing like the horror that was Material Girls. My eyes still burn from that film. I wouldn't do that to you).
Books:White Teeth by Zadie Smith, Slam by Nick Hornby, 13 Little Blue Envelopes by Maureen Johnson, Rain by Kate Le Vann, Face Value by Catherine Johnson, Finding Violet Park by Jenny Valentine, Broken Soup by Jenny Valentine, Cutting It by Jasmin Oliver. TV: ... Film:An Education, Brick Lane, Bridget Jones' Diary, Notting Hill.
All the books and films listed above are good. And what's more, they truly pull you right into the heart of their cities, letting you feel like you're there. Better than reading a travel guide, no?
But these lists are very thin on the ground, especially in regards to London interestingly enough (guess it shows how much I want to go to New York...), so if you have any recommendations of your own, leave 'em in the comments! Also, if you have any suggestions for other cities leave those in the comments too, or email, whichever is fine.
If you haven’t heard about her already, no doubt you will soon be seeing her name in the credits of your favourite films. Yes, I’m talking about Olivia Brittain, the 19 year old Bournemouth Film School student who is already running her own casting business (Olivia Brittain Casting) as well as running Straight From School. http://www.straightfromschool.org/ is a brilliant website that Olivia strarted up with her twin sister Alice (who is studying acting) and it is stuffed with brilliant advice for performers, film and tv casting gossip and details of open auditions – it’s quite addictive so I recommend you finish up here first before getting sucked into SFS.
There is also the Straight From School Youtube Channel to get hooked on, where she not only gives more advice for aspiring actors but does short and funny film reviews. Check it out:
She has worked on the casting of St Trinian’s 2 and Dagenham Girls, amongst various other projects and is currently working on her first feature film (in between shooting pieces on 16mm film for her degree) but she still kindly took the time to have a chat and tell us about everything from her serious brownie making skills, to her invaluable advice for aspiring casting directors and actors alike...
Tell us a little bit about yourself and your casting experience.
I'm Olivia, I'm 19 currently balancing life between Film School and getting work in the world of casting in the film industry. After my GCSEs I knew I had to get into the film industry so I got work placements in local TV studios to build up my knowledge of it all. I was 17 when I worked at Pinewood and Shepperton Studios and got some great experience but it was really when I was 18 and got a summer internship with Lucy Bevan Casting that I knew where I wanted to go!
What made you want to be a casting director?
My family are all actors so I was also going to end up in that side of things! It was really when I came across an interview with casting director Jina Jay (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0419605/) a few years ago that I settled my decision. In the article she spoke about the challenges of the job and how she could fight for actors sometimes, if they were newcomers or someone unproven. Something about getting to meet different people every day is a bonus too. I cut the article out and still have it stuck on my wall, and it's been my inspiration ever since.
Are there any other people who inspired you?
Casting directors like Lucy Bevan, Pippa Hall, Nina Gold and particularly Mary Selway who was legendary within the film industry.
What are your favourite films (particularly in terms of the cast)? Atonement (cast by Jina Jay) in terms of casting was brilliant and is definitely one of my favourites for that! I love Withnail and I, Emperor's New Groove, The Truman Show, Empire of the Sun, Some Like It Hot - I have so many favourites it's hard to pick just one. I will say my favourite directors include Christopher Nolan, Edgar Wright, John Hughes, Shane Meadows and Wes Anderson and would love to work with all of them (bringing Hughes back from the dead of course!).
What is the most difficult thing about the job?
The stress and high pressure to get a project done with a tricky deadline. If you get sick, everything grounds to a halt. Hours are long and when you leave the office the work doesn't stop! But there are perks that overshadow the difficult aspects!
While we're at it, what is the thing you love most about casting?
Meeting so many new great actors! Discovering new talent and taking risks with unknown faces. Trips to the theatre, seeing as many new independent films as possible as well as establishing great relationships with agents, producers and directors. My dream job basically!
Are there any up and coming actors that you are really excited about?
Many. I'm always on the look-out of course! Most aren't 'names' but if I have to say the most well-known actress I'm looking forward to seeing in more projects is Lucy Boynton and Charity Wakefield.
Any advice for people who are considering getting into casting?
The first thing I would say is to get experience as an assistant and to get to grips that it's hard work and no glamour. Checking out the Casting Director's Guild website is a must!
What is the best advice you've received?
To follow everything up. For example, when I had a work placement in a casting office I managed to lose £10 worth of stamps. It sounds small right? But I made sure I sent a thank you card including some replacement stamps. I definitely think that had I just left it I doubt I would have been asked back for an internship. Follow everything up - agents and producers will remember you and it's important to maintain good relationships.
What makes you personally really sit up and take note of an actor (apart from, of course, brilliant acting)?
Tough question, because it's hard to put your finger on it. An actor that has the right attitude, charm, initiative to take risks as well as a strong belief in their interpretation of a character is one to keep an eye on! Their performance must be captivating. If they believe it, I'll believe it.
What are the top 5 things you hate to see when you meet an actor (or even when you are approached by one, like through email or letters etc)?
I don't want to say I 'hate' certain things that actors do - so I'll safely go with little annoyances because there can be a few! My number one annoyance is when actors appear desperate. I get dozens of messages and emails from teen actors along the lines of 'plz im beggin u, can u help me get a agent?'. That depicts to me laziness if they can't be bothered to research the work themselves. Bad spelling is a natural turn off anyway, as is the desperation! Any CV and headshot submissions that type text speak get deleted straight away.
When actors don't read the breakdown properly it can cause problems too. For example if I clearly state 'Caucasian 16 year old, one headshot submission only', I can receive emails that start with 'I know I'm not Caucasian or 16... but I thought I'd submit anyway!' along with a dozen huge files attached that freezes my inbox! If you can't read the breakdown properly, how can you read the script properly or turn up to an audition on time?
In an audition too much make up is a turn off. I want to scrub it off so I can see what they look like underneath!
Triple chocolate cookies or brownies?
BROWNIES! I make some mean brownies. They have to be crispy on the outside and gooey in the middle. I add chocolate chunks to melt in the middle. Yum!
Top 5 BELONGings:
As boring as it is, I couldn't leave the house without my phone and my work would DIE if I lost my laptop! My diary as well as I honestly wouldn't know what I'd be doing for a day without it. Chocolate. My book of actors. Every actor I see in a show I will jot down for future reference. It's a bit of a bible...
How do you (if you do) want to change the world?
Change the world huh? I'll just say a little bit of kindness goes a long way - how about forcing everyone to believe in karma?
At the Noel Coward Theatre until Saturday 14th August 2010
Tickets from £12.50-£50.50, £25 seats released daily at 10am
Written by: HANNAH MARSHALL
Pouring over the theatre listings in The Independent last Saturday (in a slightly desperate attempt to get out of watching my mother squeal like a fourteen year old over Olly Murs at the X-factor live tour) I wasn’t sure if ENRON was the play for me. For one thing, I’ve never decided to compose songs about the stock market, or dressed up as a businessman with a large plastic animal head for that matter. I’ve (sadly) never fought anyone with a green lightsaber, and as you can probably guess I’m not the CEO of a multinational energy corporation who keeps a pet dinosaur in my underground office.
Send in a letter about something you want to get something off your chest.
(After the sweetness of my last post, I suppose it's time balance that out. Don't take this too seriously if you go to my school and have somehow found your way here)
Dear Schoolmates,
There are so many things I’ve always wanted to tell you. I just didn’t know how to put my feelings into words. I wish we could have gotten along better, spent more time together. Maybe then I would have had the courage to say all these things that have just been burning up inside me. I’m writing to you now because it's hurting too much to keep this from you. I'm writing because I can't take the thought of saying this out loud and I don't know any other way to let you into my heart. I hope you understand and know that I will always love you*. Here goes…
The thing is, Uggs are not the only shoe. I’d go on to say please stop constantly fucking up your outfits with this boot, if it wasn’t for my next point which is-
Abercrombie and Fitch, and Jack Wills are not the only two stores in existence. There’s a whole world out there. I’d be happy to show you.
Twilight and New Moon, the books and films, were not that good. Robert Pattinson is also not that hot. You totally saw him in Harry Potter and you didn’t give a crap about him then so why now? It’s because you’re projecting your fantasy of a dating hot, pasty 107 year old boy onto him, that's why. And don't you think that’s kind of weird? So please stop wearing hoodies that say “Property Of Edward Cullen” and ink tattooing yourself with the words “Bite Me”. You’re making all the sane people feel deeply uncomfortable.
I wish you would stop pretending to be more drunk than you actually are at parties just so you can kiss that guy your friend likes and do c-raaaaaazzzy things so you can have “great” stories to tell on the next school day. More than that, I pray you stop talking about what a wild night you had and how wasted you got, ’cause everybody knows you only had half a drink.
Listen carefully: "gay" is not an insult. Don't make me slap you.
I know we’re in an all-girls school, but you don’t have to gain respect by talking about boys like you’re an authority on the subject. Going on about how much easier they are to hang out with than girls because they’re "so much more chilled out" is just insulting given that your audience is entirely composed of girls. It’s also plain stupid since we've all seen that you're that girl - the one who acts annoyingly flirty when hanging out with guys, which simply makes them want you to piss off, ’cause they’re trying to chill out here, alright?
Schoolmates, I'm sorry to end on such a sad note, but there is one last thing that I need to tell you because it's weighing down on me so heavily I fear it may crush the last breath out of me if I don't say to you now: please stop deluding yourselves that omfgSkins is just sooooo amazing cos its just like a breath of fresh air on british tv you know i mean like it just actually represents the lives of us teens and its like totally not afraid to show what we get up to.... Um, WHAT THE F---?!! Seriously guys? Seriously. As much as I loved Skins (series 1 & a bit of 2), it does not represent your life, don't lie. If you lived in that world you would not be sitting on your ass on a thursday night watching fictional kids have a wild time, you'd be coked up somewhere getting wild yourself. And y'all know it.
Here's your fix for the week: two theatre related opportunities I've come across lately, both of which are pretty damn awesome. The first is for the writers, the actors, the directors and producers. It also serves as a holiday. The second is only for the writers. The second is . Get on it people. Deadlines are coming up fast!!! And getting into any aspect of theatre is tough, there aren't opportunities like these just lying around all the time. Both are in association with IdeasTap http://www.ideastap.com/ so you need to get an IdeasTap account to apply. But it's free and you'll find out about more opportunities through it so it's all good. (Plenty of interviews with film, tv and theatre professionals giving great advice on there too by the way)
1. Kevin Spacey's (yeah, Kevin Spacey) TS Eliot Exchange
This coming April, 50 actors, writers, directors and producers will travel from London to New York to engage in a week of cultural activity and artistic development, hosted by The Public Theater, an NYC institution and home to some of America's most exhilarating theatre. The following month, 50 American artists will travel to London to take part in a similar program at The Old Vic, the legendary home of Laurence Olivier, John Gielgud, and now under the artistic direction of Kevin Spacey.
During The TS Eliot US/UK Exchange you will spend a week living, learning, and developing theatre in a vibrant and intense city. You will be able to build your contacts within the theatrical industry and have the chance to learn from some of the finest and most successful people in the business.
2. WordPlay Script Competition
Being a fledgling writer can be a lonely business. It's all late nights at the computer and sitting alone in front of empty pages wondering when you might get your first big break. But sometimes, all you need is a nudge in the right direction.
That's why the National Youth Theatre is looking for new writers who need a bit of guidance. They'll invite five writers to attend a two-day development workshop with professional mentors and directors. From that workshop two of the writers will be selected to have their plays put into full production at a London venue as part of NYT's 2010 season. The plays will be performed by members of the Playing Up 2 course, part of the National Youth Theatre's Creative Learning Programme.
Fifteen further writers will be chosen to receive written feedback on their work.
For now we don't need the full play, just an outline of your idea and some indication of how it will work. You need to fill out an application form (link to form here) which will ask you for the following:
- A detailed synopsis of your idea for a play. It should relate in some way to one of the four topics below and be no more than 500 words
-Detailed character breakdowns for 10 defined characters or a detailed description of how your play could be performed by an ensemble of 10
-A draft of four completed scenes of your play. We need to get a feel for you as a writer so we would like at least 10 pages in total.
We're looking for ideas that best represent the experiences of the Playing Up students so we'd like to see work around the following themes: mental health, asylum seeking/immigration, the rise of political nationalism in Britain or class conflict. Feel free to use more than one of the themes and to interpret them literally or abstractly. They're just a pointer to some of the work the students have been exploring so you don't need to stick to them too rigidly.
There are 20 members of the Paying Up 2 course, so we're looking for two ensemble plays that offer strong character roles to at least 10 performers. There are no restrictions in terms of gender, and the National Youth Theatre encourage you to think creatively and experiment.
Following the sudden outburst of reality TV dance shows going by creepily similar names (Got To Dance? Love To Dance? Time To Dance? What?), some genius has decided to make a UK teen dance movie brilliantly entitled, “StreetDance”. It is shot in 3D and “tells the story of a group of street dancers rehearsing for the StreetDance Championships but when they lose their rehearsal space and are forced to team up with a group of ballet dancers, the dancers are challenged to succeed in a whole new world”.
Um. You know that's the plot of like 10 other films, right?
Will somebody please tell me why on earth these flops keep being churned out? Even the spoof that looked to address the general awfulness of dance movies was terrible. Enough is enough. Dance movies have been rehashed, reworked and remixed and I refuse to watch another. They are weaving a really unoriginal web here and they must be stopped.
Don’t get me wrong, I loved Step Up 2 and I have watched Save The Last Dance more times than is healthy, however teen dance movies are honestly beginning to merge into one repetitive mash-up of dance sequences in my mind.
But for all the budding directors and people generally looking to make some easy money out there, if you too are interested in sneezing out one of these rip-offs of rip-offs here are the simple foolproof steps to do so:
1. Find some good-looking great dancers in possession of deeply questionable acting talent.
2. Hastily make up a script with the following crucial element:
A boy/girl from the wrong side of the tracks is somehow thrown together with a girl/boy from the right side of the tracks. There must be a spark between them and if you want this can be demonstrated through a sexual dance scene.
e.g Step Up 1&2, Dirty Dancing.
3. Merge 2 dance styles in a “new” and exciting way-- that has already been done in at least 5 other dance films. Ballet plus street dance is always a favourite but you must take care to ensure that the street dancers are predominantly urrghban black kids with heaps of attitude and/or spicy latinas and sexy latinos.
e.g. Save The Last Dance, Take The Lead and every single Bring It On movie ever made (for the purpose of these instructions, cheer movies count. Cheerleading is basically dance + gymnastics anyway.)
4. Have around 10 minutes of straight dancing for the culmination of the film, preferably at an audition or dance off between kids from opposing track sides (and please, don’t feel free to branch out).
e.g. You Got Served and Make It Happen
Ok, let's get to the point: the main problem with the dance movies of these times is that the acting and/or the storyline are really half-assed. It's simple - amazing dancing will never make up for poor lines à la “What do you want Sarah? Do you want Juilliard? Then you must DANCE!” and other more cringe-inducing rubbish. The pretty decent acting is what made Step Up 2 for me, while Jessica Alba’s insincere ballet teacher harbouring a secret desire to be a hip hop video choreographer (seriously, wtf guys?) meant that, despite using basketball moves to make an awesome dance, Honey still makes me want to gag. I can only hope that StreetDance will not follow in the dance steps of its predecessors and instead, bring it. But with a plot like that, I highly doubt that even its 3D-ness and George Sampson starring as “the loveable Eddie” could save it.
